A Christmas Mystery, with apologies to Clement Clarke Moore

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By Chatham George Paulson-Thomas & Stefan Schoofveldt

‘Twas the day before Christmas, and all through the town,
Not a creature was stirring; they’re all hunkered down.
But in the bike shop, a mystery reared,
A missing bicycle, from its rack disappeared.

Detective Clara Pedalton, a cyclist with flair,
Arrived at the shop, ready to declare,
“I’ll find this bike, to keep it from freezing,
No mystery shall ruin this Christmas season.”

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Clara pedaled through snowy lanes,
Interviewing folks, exercising her brain.
From carolers to shopkeepers, each had a tale,
Of a jingling bike, on a Christmas trail.

At the North Pole, working in haste,
At Santa’s workshop, with a lead she was graced.
The elves giggled, the reindeer played,
But a bike that is missing? Santa’s dismayed.

A mysterious map, wrapped in paper bright,
Led Clara on a magical yuletide flight.
Through candy cane forests and mistletoe lanes,
Towards the missing bike and festive chains.

A gingerbread café, so warm and so sweet,
Revealed more clues, on a Brooks leather seat.
Clara sipped cocoa, crumbs in her lap,
Solving the case with a gingerbread snap.

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Sleigh bells jingled, a suspect appeared,
A cyclist named Kris, as Clara feared.
With tinsel in spokes, he confessed with glee,
“I borrowed the bike for a Christmas spree.”

But Kris was a decoy, the mystery deepened,
Clara tried to keep up, as the road steepened.
Clara dug deeper, in logs she found,
Shiny strands of tinsel. “Yes! the bike is around!”

Through snow-covered hills and frozen streams,
Clara followed the shimmering gleams.
A winter wonderland, mysteries untold,
Where was the bike; alone in the cold?

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On Christmas Eve, a midnight ride,
Clara chased shadows, with lights on her side.
Through snowy alleys, beneath starry skies,
Reindeer footprints, a Christmas surprise.

In the town square, garlands wound tight,
Clara discovered a peculiar sight.
The missing bike, ever so near,
Tangled in tinsel, adorned with cheer!

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The mystery solved, the town loudly voiced,
“Christmas is saved,” as Clara rejoiced
Back at the bike shop, the cycle returned,
A cozy Christmas, a Yule log burned.

With tinsel and laughter, the bike back in place,
A holiday mystery, the town e’er embraced.

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1 COMMENT

  1. I’m a tad confused. Did Steven Sheffield write this or was it written by the duo mentioned (George Paulson-Thomas & Stefan Schoofveldt)? I have been compiling some parodies, and, since I’m not sure what I’m going to do with it, I would like to give proper credit if it goes anywhere.

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